Thursday, March 10, 2011

Rule 10: A Few Tidbits and Tying Up Loose Ends

1. My D&D stuff made it to Vineyard, and should be arriving at my house today. :)
2. I was able to type the & sign without looking at my fingers... twice.  This is a big accomplishment for me.
3. I got a 98% on my Yoga midterm.  The test wasn't hard, but it still feels good.

Well, here it is:  the last day of my rules of dating.  I hope you've enjoyed them the same way that I have, and if I only help one guy do better at dating I'll feel like I've done well (so if this info helped you and you said something about it in the comments, I wouldn't feel too bad...).

First off, I meant to mention this, but found no nice place to put it:  Beware of Perseverance Propaganda.  "What is Perseverance Propaganda?" you might ask.  It is American media.  It's every movie and song where the girl cannot stand the guy at the beginning and somehow, by his harassing her, she falls in love with him and they end up together.  Guys, do not be obnoxious.  Do not fall into the trap of thinking that if you could only stalk this girl for a few months she'd eventually fall for you.  Chances are, she won't, and she'll hate you more by the end of things, tell all her friends that you won't leave her alone, and depending on the girl, you'll end up face first in a garbage can, courtesy of the football team.  So, if she's not interested, leave her alone.  Now, you might ask, how do I know if she is just busy, or if she is not interested.  Good question.  Here's a good rule of thumb:  Ask her out three times.  If she's 'busy' three times, give up.  Unless of course each time she says no she tells you to ask her again. Then, chances are, she really does want to go, but really is just busy often.  If you ask her and she just says she's busy that day, stick to the rule of three.

Secondly, don't get discouraged.  Dating can be fun.  I had fun by the end of things, and I got turned down more then than in any other time of my dating. You just have to switch your paradigm from thinking you need to find THE ONE, to you finding the one that would be fun this weekend, and if things go well from there, so be it.  Ask a lot, get turned down a lot.  My cousin (the one who said dating is a numbers game) said he got the info from his mom, and his mom gave him the ratio of 10 turn downs to 1 number.  It seems like a steep ratio, but my experience says it's true.  But think, every turn down, is one of those tens that will lead you to a number.

Third, realize that there are always exceptions.  For the most part, consider yourself the rule (you'll have more luck this way), but also know that every couple is probably an exception in someway to any of my rules.  You see super ugly guys with attractive women all the time, my mom couldn't stand my dad to begin with, and I swore for the first time in front of my wife while we were dating when I thought her dad was going to run into the shore while water skiing.  If you break a rule, don't think that it's the end of things, but if it is, don't be too surprised.

Anyway, that's all of the knowledge on this subject I'll dispense here (for now).  Do look forward to the book I plan on writing on this subject, I promise I'll keep you posted.  And as always, have a nice day.


  1. 1. Congrats on the accomplishment, I still can't hit the ampersand without looking.
    I do hope you will publish this, good advice.

  2. Thanks. It's come after years of typing... Oh, and my dad and I are already starting to lay things out to make it into a book. Hopefully I'll be trying to sell it to all of you here in a few months...

  3. 10 - 1 rejection ratio? wow. this makes me think i'm not getting rejected nearly enough, maybe I'm settling

  4. Oh, it varies from guy to guy. 1/10 is just a good rule of thumb so you don't get discouraged. If you do better, good on ya.