Thursday, August 18, 2011

Day 1: Paul May or May Not Ruin His Child

1.  A friend of mine told me how to play Oblivion so I don't get killed all the time.
2.  I have opposable thumbs.  They're just useful.
3.  The pacifier.  Whoever figured that out deserves the peace prize.

Well, today is my first day alone with the pretty princess.  I wasn't sure her mother would actually leave me alone with her, but today was her first day back at work and the girl is all mine.  The brain washing has begun.  Her and I are watching Remo Williams as I type this (a goofy action movie).  I want to make sure she likes the kind of movies I like so that when a vote is cast on what to watch it'll be like two votes automatically for my side.  I debated explaining their, there, and they're so I'd have another Grammar Nazi on my side, but thought it was too soon.  I mean, we need to teach her to act superior to everyone else and feel the joy of making people feel stupid before we get into grammar.  It just won't stick unless she realizes how much joy it can bring.

All kidding aside I was a little nervous for this day.  I don't think I've been alone with her for more than three hours in a stretch and now it'll be a total of eight hours.  I was afraid she'd start crying as soon as Mom left and then I'd have eight hours of screaming.  As it turns out, our little girl really doesn't seem to mind being around me, or she's just too nice to tell me so.  She slept until nine or so. I fed her at ten.  And now she lays in the little bouncer watching a movie.  Ladies and Gentlemen, this may actually work out.  I might not let our daughter die, or go crazy.  I have a feeling I'll have a good day.

You go and do the same.


  1. I'm sure you're a very capable dad and will do a great job with your daughter. Way to go!!

  2. Sounds like you're on the right track so far. It's never too early to learn about one's superiority or proper grammar, I say.

    P.S.: What do you think about that new game, 'Catherine'. Looks interesting, no?

  3. Good work. And yes, make her a grammar nazi. That's the only kind of nazis there should be.

  4. @Hansen,
    Thanks for the vote of confidence. :)

    That's what I figure. She's the best, she might as well be a brat about it. And I've seen a few things for Catherine. It does look interesting, and it got really high scores by Gamespot (were I get my information for games). Though, it seems like it would be a bit dark for my taste. I may still give it a look though if I can get it for cheap.

    Agreed. To be honest, I don't know how she could grow up in our house and be any other kind of Nazi. We're too accepting of anything but bad grammar for her to be.

  5. Not worried, you'll be a great dad.

    Been very busy, but will read your story when things calm down.

  6. I know how that goes. Whenever you have time man.